stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
