Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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