4 words: hood of his car
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
