No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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