I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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