I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
