Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
