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That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
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