went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
tell me about the fingering
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