Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Randomize
