This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Randomize
