I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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