By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
