Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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