haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
What a dumb baby whore.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
