She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
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