I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
