i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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