I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
