...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize