Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
