i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
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