Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
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I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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