I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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