so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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