Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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