i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize