The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
