that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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