when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
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