Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
sarcasm needs its own font
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize