he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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