Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
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dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
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Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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