I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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