when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
