Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
