Fuck appropriateness.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I am midnight drunk by noon
i dont even know how to be here
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize