I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
