Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
