Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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