Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
40s are totally the cure
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
