We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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