Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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