BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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