and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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