Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
