Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
