sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
