the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
