seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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