He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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