This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
